Jimmy V. Speech for the College Man:

In Sports by Ryco Newton-Block

Original:

“To me there are three things everyone should do every day. Number one is laugh. Number two is think — spend some time in thought. Number three, you should have your emotions move you to tears. If you laugh, think and cry, that’s a heck of a day.”

College:

“To me there are three things every college male should do every day. Number one is drink. Number two is fight — spend some time fighting. Number three, you should have your emotions stimulated to the point of fucking. If you drink, fight and fuck, that’s a heck of a day.”

About the Author

Ryco Newton-Block

Ryco Newton-Block is a comedy writer and stand-up comic from South Florida. Read more...